Wednesday 30 March 2011
MY LIFE...MY FRIEND
Have you ever felt like me before...no...i doubt it. there are times when you wanna say something and there's this fight within you,shud i say it?...shud i not say it?...oh my gosh it's happening again.I wanna talk about something but i end up writing something else. This is about the third time i'm writing this post.I had clicked on new post with the intention of writing something else but look what I got...just know this wasn't what i intended...but what i wanted to write lies deep inside of me..I just need to let it out or get someone to help me...now that's my problem...i never get anyone to help cos i never let it out...hmph...I hate to talk about myself...I really should just go back to writing ma poems and stories...Life could unfold in different ways to you ,it could appear like a friend, happy family...great job...good friends...comfort...then u'd have wished for nothing better. But when it turns upside down,it just makes it difficult for you standing the right way up.....Life's just like friends,u smile together,at times,she makes you frown and cry and sad...she gives you hope and makes you smile and makes you feel there are no worries...at other times,she could just leave you confused and makes u wanna think outside the box while the answer lies in the box, she could make you wanna give in to pressure but u just learn to stand your ground...but just be who you are no matter how close you guys are and how you can't do without her and she without you...and how together u guys make things work..just be who you are...that's exactly who life is-your friend...
Sunday 27 March 2011
MY VILLAGE CHILDREN
I used to sit at the balcony
of the old one storey
every morning
and watch the little boys
hurriedly going to check their traps,
half naked
while the chickened ones offered to do the cooking
the little girls, their rappers glued to their bodies
If it loosened one bit
they dropped their brooms to tie it
eyeing the boys around
who weren't even looking their way
as if they had something worth covering
other than two tiny stones on their chest
and a flat behind some forced to shake
with the aid of the beads around their waist
as they held on to their mother's hand
on the way to the market
"Ta! ogini!"
they would scream at any boy who dared look their way
The boys always ran away,giggling
and saying one to another
"I will deal with those pompous girls!"
Then I laughed...
of the old one storey
every morning
and watch the little boys
hurriedly going to check their traps,
half naked
while the chickened ones offered to do the cooking
the little girls, their rappers glued to their bodies
If it loosened one bit
they dropped their brooms to tie it
eyeing the boys around
who weren't even looking their way
as if they had something worth covering
other than two tiny stones on their chest
and a flat behind some forced to shake
with the aid of the beads around their waist
as they held on to their mother's hand
on the way to the market
"Ta! ogini!"
they would scream at any boy who dared look their way
The boys always ran away,giggling
and saying one to another
"I will deal with those pompous girls!"
Then I laughed...
WHAT REALLY MATTERS?
A friend sent me this and I felt some people should read this...it could really help out in working things out u know...
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.
At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I ran up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! .....
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.
At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I ran up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! .....
Saturday 26 March 2011
Debut: Meeeee
Debut: Meeeee: "I had nothing doing during preparatory classes.It was so quiet and ...just uninteresting. Then Lara had this crazy idea of us doing or..."
Meeeee
I had nothing doing during preparatory classes.It was so quiet and ...just uninteresting. Then Lara had this crazy idea of us doing or writing just about anything that comes to our head first."Let the game begin"...I was able to make some sense out of the first things than came to my head and instantly i wrote them down was just imagining what i was thinking on the day I was born...
MY BIRTH
5:30pm
On a sunday evening
Mouths wagging in disbelief
At my arrival
Hours in the waiting room
Minutes in the theatre
And I was out of that place
where different tubes and tubules
Hung around another like branches
All tied up to me.
Me, sweating profusely
What on earth am I doing here?!
Trying to gain my freedom, my sticky legs hit an opening
I'm happy, it's a passage
And out I came, forcing myself all the way
Free at last!
But still worse problems
All eyes on me, I'm angry
"Everyone close your eyes!"I scream
They don't hear me
You all must be deaf!
What an intrusion on my privacy
Yet they keep on laughing and
everyone keep opening those white enamel-like squares
Though some are brown
How come I don't have them?
Who are they anyway?
And what right have they over my...my...
Well my nudity.
It's all unfair and I'm angry;I frown
What the hell is wrong with everybody in here?
They all burst out laughing real hard and murmuring
things like 'crying' 'oh baby!' 'oh my beautiful girl'
Can you imagine?
I hissed and then they started running around
"Get a napkin!" a man calls out
Now I am certain that within these white walls
are people who are mentally derailing.
I fall asleep till the eight day when I am named
MY BIRTH
5:30pm
On a sunday evening
Mouths wagging in disbelief
At my arrival
Hours in the waiting room
Minutes in the theatre
And I was out of that place
where different tubes and tubules
Hung around another like branches
All tied up to me.
Me, sweating profusely
What on earth am I doing here?!
Trying to gain my freedom, my sticky legs hit an opening
I'm happy, it's a passage
And out I came, forcing myself all the way
Free at last!
But still worse problems
All eyes on me, I'm angry
"Everyone close your eyes!"I scream
They don't hear me
You all must be deaf!
What an intrusion on my privacy
Yet they keep on laughing and
everyone keep opening those white enamel-like squares
Though some are brown
How come I don't have them?
Who are they anyway?
And what right have they over my...my...
Well my nudity.
It's all unfair and I'm angry;I frown
What the hell is wrong with everybody in here?
They all burst out laughing real hard and murmuring
things like 'crying' 'oh baby!' 'oh my beautiful girl'
Can you imagine?
I hissed and then they started running around
"Get a napkin!" a man calls out
Now I am certain that within these white walls
are people who are mentally derailing.
I fall asleep till the eight day when I am named
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